(click on image to enlarge)
Art critic: How is this piece the metaphorical offspring of ‘Manimal’?
Artist: It isn’t. It’s the actual offspring.
He’s the lovechild of Elmo and one of the zoo animals.
Art critic: But I thought Elmo was their opposite- in some way their captive.
Artist: There was an element of Stockholm Syndrome, you’re right.
But fundamentally, beasts are beasts. We all have the same animal urges.
Elmo did what comes naturally.
Art Critic: With whom? From the form, I’m guessing one of the horses.
Artist: Christ, I’m not going to do a DNA test.
Art critic: Probably not the panda though.
Artist: Look, son of manimal is a new kind of creature.
Sure, he’s got a body, four legs and a tail. But he’s also got a horn like a unicorn.
You’re not going to find markings like that on any animal, anywhere. Not even in Wales.
He is part myth, part reality.
Art critic: And he’s wearing what on his back right leg? An ankle bracelet?
Artist: Actually, it’s an electronic tag. Son of manimal is an armed robber.
He was never going to fit in with that kind of heritage.
But, don’t forget, it’s society that creates the real monsters.
Art critic: It isn’t a clay figure your son was making at his friend’s birthday party and which you hi-jacked, is it?
Artist: No, it isn’t.